I love a party with a happy atmos-fear.
Normally it takes either a spectacularly bad or stunningly good episode of Doctor Who to get me back behind the keyboard. Sometimes I’m kicked from my lethargy because I have a really good title for a review. Unfortunately I can’t claim any of the above as an excuse for getting off my backside. But if RTD can bring back the Sontarans, then by gosh, I can start reviewing an episode from the fourth season.
I’ve never been a huge Sontaran fan. How can a creature that looks like an over developed Weeble Wobble really get anyone going? 
They may be the most feared warrior race in the known universe and true, they may, like their diminutive counterparts, never fall down (probic vent weakness not withstanding), but we’ve never been given much evidence of their warlike ways. And when you come to realise that their mortal enemy is a radioactive brussel sprout , you do begin to question their battle cry bluster. So I neither love nor loath them. They just don’t particularly ring my bells or tick my boxes or whatever it is one has to go through to feel satisfied these days. I don’t think I’ve ever felt the urge to take The Time Warrior off the shelf, other than to see if my Star Wars Tazos have fallen down the back of the bookcase. The best thing about The Sontaran Experiment was the Tachyon podcast. I haven’t pre-ordered The Invasion of Time and the less said about The Two Doctors the better.
Yet, that aside I rather enjoyed The Sontaran Stratagem. It was safe Doctor Who, familiar and fun. It had an air of ‘classic Who’ about it – hardly surprising since we also saw the return of UNIT as well as an old adversary. And while we’ve yet to meet a real successor to the Brigadier (quite the opposite it seems), I’m glad that the boys are back to entertain us and no doubt cause a little havoc in the second part, arriving just a little past the nick of time. It’s also good to see that this once top secret organisation have gone down the Torchwood route of disguise and emblazoned their mobile HQ with the UNIT logo. All that was missing were a couple of UNIT rentagrunts stood agog as something alien ponced its way towards them. Oh wait, that did happen (kind of) and they got zapped in the shins by Sontaran Staal. Appropriate really, given that the UNIT goons accused him of being a child that he gave them the sonic equivalent of an ankle-bite!
Christopher Ryan was a hoot as Staal and I was pleasantly surprised by the make-up after my initial fears on seeing that ‘thing’ in the Radio Times at the start of the season. Thank the maker they didn’t use that… oh, they did. The posh Sontaran – what does he look and soundlike? Still it once again reminded me of Old Who – an actor fresh from RADA, who thought he was reading for a part in Richard III. Little did he know that the title was merely rhyming slang to keep the fans fooled. Actually I think I know what’s going on with the Sontarans. First we get Angry Sontaran, then Posh. Next week the invading force will reveal Baby, Ginger and Sporty (the latter will no doubt take on the Doctor at squash and not get hit in the probic vent). The Doctor will defeat them, but in ten years time they will be back for the reunion invasion after failing miserably with solo projects of destruction across the galaxy.
I won’t waste too much time with Donna. I’ve always liked Catherine Tate and had no doubts that she’d be fine in the new series. While she will always be haunted by the many comedic creations from her previous series to the point where you’re almost hoping she will get just a little bit bovvered, she is a good counterpoint to the Doctor. She continues to prove herself admirably each week, and so far (although far too early to tell) the return of Martha hasn’t sidelined her to the point of pointlessness, although he walk down memory lane was a bit OTT. Next she’ll be having flashbacks from two minutes ago, recalling that time when she put the left leg forward before the right as she walked.
Another pleasant surprise was Rattingan, boy genius. A well realised villain driven by tantrums and a ‘bratishness’ that managed to avoid high camp and proved to be a worthy adversary for the Doctor. He was a cross between Bill gates and Woody Allen – and science fiction has been crying out for such a hybrid for days. It’s a good move to include these kinds of sidekick villains in a Sontaran story, as you just can’t imagine the Doctor and Staal discussing much beyond “war good”, “no war bad”. I’m just not sure who will put Rattingan over their knee first and gives him six of the best, because he needs a bloody good spanking. And no that is not a euphemism.
I’m not sure if it’s just me, but the episode felt very much like Rise of the Cybermen. We have the returning classic monster, the alien technology already well established across the globe, the evil factory, the human baddie, the ‘hypnotised’ humans and many of the same, all too recognisable locations. Of course, the extras in this story weren’t a patch on the ones used in ROTC, but you can’t have everything – I’ve been busy. I swear one of the door guards even blinked – but I bet no one starts a bloody thread about that. No. Not that I’m in the least bit bitter and twisted. I’ll be starting my own academy next, developing a range of toilet paper that cleans itself with every wipe.
So all in all, an enjoyable, none to taxing first part. And while the fans were screaming “get a brick!” when poor old Bernie was trapped in the car, we do at least see Donna’s Mum run off for something. I can understand the Doctor not thinking about the bleedin’ obvious – that’s the curse of a genius I guess, but surely Donna would have found something lying around. Although the neighbourhood didn’t look like ASBO hell, so maybe the odd brick or window-smashing implement wasn’t such an easy item to procure. Still, nothing detracts from that marvellous final image of the Doctor looking lost in the mist. Is all lost? Tennant was very good in this instalment, toning his performance down several notches but still suitably alien and eccentric, the trademarks of any discerning Time Lord. But anyhow, once the second part has aired it may ignite a new found passion for the intergalactic Mr. Hankeys. I just hope they have the courage to do something good with evil Martha, because if this is just an excuse to get her and the Doctor snogging, it won’t be big and it won’t be clever.
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